Tuesday, August 5, 2008
In Other Words Tuesday
“I do not know that the prodigal saw his father, but his father saw him. The eyes of mercy are quicker than the eyes of repentance. Even the eyes of our faith is dim, compared with the eye of God’s love. He sees a sinner long before a sinner sees Him.” C.H. Spurgeon (Sermon based upon the Prodigal Son): Where are You Father? I cannot see You. My heart is broken and bleeding, I am laying here on the bathroom floor. I am preparing to cut myself once again, the pain is so deep and intense. I need to find a way to numb this hellish pain of grief I am feeling. My momma is gone, she is with You. I know she is in a much better place, no more pain. But, my selfish human side is crying out for my momma. I need her, I want to see her, and talk to her. I need some momma love, those precious hugs. What am I going to do without her? How can I go on? I not only lost my momma, but now I have lost You. I have been such a bad person, falling into the deep dark pit of depression, and then self mutilation. How can You ever forgive me? This was a conversation that I had with my precious Father in May of 2006, after my momma had passed away in April. My Father came running to my side, He comforted me, He healed my brokenness. He forgave me, completely. Mercy was shown to this broken, and lost daughter. The prodigal daughter will never leave her Father again. Thank You Father, I love You.