Wednesday, February 27, 2013
When It rains, it pours
Well, things just keep happening. It is raining, and pouring bad news around here.I really need your prayers for my sister. She had to be taken by ambulance Tuesday night to the hospital. She is in intensive care, she has pneumonia, and a very bad kidney infection. Her name is Vicki. I had an appointment with my neurologist, Dr. Devlin. He took care of me when I had my stroke. We had a long talk about how I was feeling. I asked him some questions concerning how I have felt since my stroke. I told him that I felt like a totally different person. He asked about my moods. I told him that I was sad, and felt very lonely. I really opened up, and shared my feelings with him. He is a good Doctor, and a Christian. I told him that my marriage had changed since the stroke. I expressed my feelings about Eddie. Told him that I felt like I was very much a burden to Eddie now. I said, I truly feel when Eddie is cursing at me, yelling at me, and talking down to me, that I should have just died when I had the stroke. So much of the time these days, I feel as if I am just an empty shell inside this body. I never have anything to look forward to except when I know I am going to get to see my little man. Otherwise, nothing. Eddie does not pay any attention to me, except to yell, curse, treat me like a brain damaged woman that had a stroke, or a little kid. Dr, Devlin said, I am definitely suffering from depression, and also, I am going through what is known as a grieving season. Alot of people after they have had a stroke, go through this. He said, it would really be good if I had the love and support of my husband and others. I said, I have the love and support of my friends(all of you, thanks) and my loving Father. On March 21, I go back to see him, and he is going to talk to me about the different depression medicines, and get me started on something. Him, my primary care doctor, and the doctor that treats my diabetes are all concerned about me. I am blessed to have good doctors. But, they all voiced their concerns about me running in the race. I told them it was very important to me, it was something to look forward to.