Thankful Thursday

Father God, I cry out to You with an overflowing heart at this midnight hour. The enemy continues to try to defeat me, but he is nothing but a big loser. You and I together cannot, and will not be defeated. You are the banner I proudly wave over my head, now, and through out eternity. You are the lifter of my head, the healer of my heart, soul, body, and mind. I am forever grateful for You, and Your love. Without You, I would already be dead, but with You, I can, and will face tomorrow. If more storms come my way, You will be my Lighthouse. You are my precious Father God, I love You, I love You.

Monday&Tuesday

Hello my dear friends, I pray that all of you are doing well. Sorry I was not online yesterday, I was at the emergency room. I got very sick on Monday, and started throwing up once again, and could not eat anything until today. After Eddie went to work Tuesday morning, I kept getting worse and worse. I was very scared, so I called an ambulance about 4:30 in the morning. They got here really fast, thank You Father God. They took me to the hospital, where they began to work on me. They were trying to get an IV started on me, but I was so dehydrated, my veins kept blowing on both arms. They finally had to put an IV in my neck, it really hurt. They started me on an IV drip bag, and gave me morphine for the pain, and medicine for nausea. My blood pressure was running very high, and my heart kept going into arrhythmia. They told me that the singer Karen Carpenter had heart arrhythmia due to her anorexia, and it is what killed her. Now, I have it, every time I throw up, it throws my heart into arrhythmia. Please keep me in your prayers. They sent me home with two kinds of nausea medicine. They really knock me out, but help with the nausea. I slept all night last night, and most of the day today. I was able to eat a little bit today, first since Sunday. Will write again tomorrow, love you all bunches.

The Voices

The voices want to destroy me, tear me apart from my Father God. They want me to continue to throw up, and be in physical pain. They want me to be weak, and totally defenseless. They try their best to convince me that I am nothing but a loser, and that no one loves me, or cares about me. Wrong!! Go back to hell where you belong. Father God does love me. He is right here with me, and will never leave me, all I have to do, is call that precious name. Father God, I love You, and I need You. I am sorry for disappointing You by my recent actions. Please forgive me. You are my forever shelter. No one reigns on the throne of my heart, except you.

The Weekend

Wow, what a busy weekend. I loved it, lol On Saturday, our nephew Zach spent the day with us. I had the entire day planned out. We were going to go to the duck pond, then to the park, and then to buy some toys. After that, we were going to go home, and make some cupcakes. Well, things quickly changed, when the check engine light began to flash in our car. We had to go to the auto store for help. We were told that we needed new spark plugs, and plug wires. Zach and I just looked at each other, shrugged our shoulders, and came up with a new plan, lol Eddie came home, changed clothes, and turned into a mechanic, for the next several hours. Zach and I played ball, cars, Elmo, Winnie the pooh, colored, took a ride in a magic chair(wink, wink) walked all over the neighborhood, kicked our feet in the swimming pool, and made cupcakes. We had a super blast. Sunday, our sweet little niece came over for the day. She is precious, she rearranged our entire apartment, lol It was a weekend filled with fun, and love, love, love.

Midnight Cries

Father God, here it is midnight, and once again, I cannot sleep. All I can manage to do is cry, and call out Your precious name. But, that is more than enough for me. You are all I need Father, all I will ever need. I had not been able to eat anything since the turkey sandwich I ate on Tuesday, could not keep anything down. I was finally able to eat last night(Friday Night), but a couple of hours after I ate, the waves of nausea came rolling in, and I threw up everything I had ate. Then, my blood sugar dropped to 60, then back to 103, then to 63. I was really scared, it would not stop dropping. My head hurt so bad, the pain made me cry. I refuse to give in to this eating disorder, or to my diabetes. I will survive this, You will bring me through this Father. I will be stronger for fighting this battle, there is a reason for this, You will not leave me. Miracles can, and will happen through You my precious Father. I will forever shout Your name during my midnight cries. Glory to Your name always. I love You Father.

Hello Sweet Friends

Hello my precious friends, sending you all prayers and hugs. My thoughts and prayers have never left you. Thanks to you that have written to me, I appreciate you very much. I have missed you all so much. Please let me know how I can pray for you. As for my health, things are still rough. I am still in a battle with the eating disorder, I weigh 103 right now. I just got home from the hospital last Saturday, was in there due to throwing up and nausea, could not eat. I am in need of your prayers. On July 12, I almost died, really scared Lovebug. He was in the shower, and he said he heard me screaming his name. He came running into the living room, I was standing in front of the patio door, I looked at him and said help me. Then, he said my eyes rolled back in my head, and I fell to the floor. I started having a seizure, he checked my blood sugar, and it was 58. He called an ambulance, and by the time they got here, my blood sugar was 50. I give my Father God all the praise for saving my life. Without Him, I would already be dead. I love Him, oh how I love my Father God. Take care my friends, I love you all with all of my heart. Bye for now. Later tomorrow.