Saturday, March 14, 2009

Cafe Chat


First of all, do you struggle with insecurity issues? Yes, unfortunately, I do. If yes, can you tell of a specific situation that happened to you that brought out your insecurities? When my stepfather sexually abused me, I felt so ashamed. I felt so dirty, like I was a lowly worm. All my self doubts, were magnified. I already had insecurities, and after the abuse happened, things got even worse. If you do struggle with insecurity, what do you believe is the root cause of your insecurity? I truly believe that the root cause of my insecurity, began when my parents got divorced. I was in the sixth grade, my dad had just came home from prison, then they told me they were getting a divorce. From that moment on, things went downhill. My dad remarried three different times, and my momma remarried. Neither one of them had much time for me anymore, I felt forgotten. They treated me like a yo yo, I would live with my momma, and then she would send me to live with dad, then with my sister, and then my brother. It was crazy!! Then, when I was finally back living with my momma, my stepfather sexually abused me. Momma did not believe me, and sent me to live with my sister again. So, that is where the root cause of my insecurity began.

16 comments:

A Stone Gatherer said...

I am always hurt broken by the things that have happened to you, but rejoice with you for overcoming!

Beth in NC said...

God bless you Denise. I cannot imagine the childhood you had. I am so sorry. Satan definitely tries to get us when we are young and uncovered.

I am thankful that you survived and know how much the Lord loves you. What a SHINING LIGHT on a hill you are!

Love,
Beth

Tea With Tiffany said...

This is a very personal and honest answer. I admire your willingness to be real. Families can cause us pain at a very young age and those wounds have a way of playing themselves out in our lives. My prayer for you is that you see yourself not as you were once treated but as you really are.

Beautiful.
Handcrafted.
Loved.
Chosen.
Accepted.
Redeemed.
Free!

I love you,

Tiffany

Toknowhim said...

Sweet Denise...

So much pain for a young soul, but I just want you to know that through your blog posting I see you as a person full of love. Our God is Real!!!

Thanks for sharing today :)

April said...

You have been through so much, Denise, but with God's grace and mercy, you've been reborn! Shout it from the rooftops, my friend!♥

Sarah said...

Hello Denise! Hope you had already received my email last time from melodymakers26@yahoo.com. Wasn't able to connect these days because I'm quite busy with my teaching career.
We're having English Camp. See you around if I have time.
God bless!

Sarah said...

Yes I'm quite stressed these week. Thanks for a reminder.

Angela said...

Thanks so much for sharing your heart with us and your openess..I SO connected with this,,,,,((hugs))

you gotta wonder said...

Bless you, dear Denise. I'm praying for all victims of sexual abuse/domestic violence. Another blogger has set up a site http://violenceunsilenced.com. It's time to claim victory over the demons that haunt us, that make us victims of our past. I'm glad you are able to boldly call out this piece of your story and I pray that with God's help you are able to overcome the scars and be strong.

ohhollyf said...

God's design for our lives is not to suffer as you have, yet the sinful word we live in hurts us continuly. I n reading this my heart is glad you have a close relationship with our Savior....I am intersted now in how he's be healing you, maybe if just in bits & pieces, here and there ?
I love the scripture in Gen. where Joseph talks about....you intended evil, but God has made good....

Michele Williams said...

I am so sorry you have had to endure so much pain and suffering through your childhood! Your life.... I am so thankful that He is our divine Healer. He binds up our wounds and heals our broken hearts. No one or nothing else can do this kind of healing that a soul needs! It's wonderful that you are so open to share you story with others so that God can use you as an instrument of His grace! Blessings my dear friend... I love you...

Twinkle Mom (Sunflower Faith) said...

*Hugs* God bless you Denise for just the strength for sharing what you had gone through. You are so loved by many and most of all by our Heavenly Father!

luvmy4sons said...

I have often wondered why God allowed my sexual abuse...but I figure He used it to make me the person I am. Hearing your story, I know that you are one of the sweetest people I know. I am still sorry it happened to you but can surely see God used it to fashion a real sweet heart!

Daphine said...

My heart breaks reading this friend! Though I rejoice with you that the Lord has given you a spirit of forgiveness and boldness through all of this! You are sweet and precious sister lady! God continued blessings upon you.

purplemoose said...

Oh, I am so sorry. Its always amazing to me how God can get us through our childhood hurts and we can survive, and thrive, in the worst situations. I wonder how does one get rid of insecurities?

Mary said...

Denise,

Divorce affects the psych of the young and sexual abuse affects the life of the victim and their relationships as long as they live. I'm so sorry you had to go through these dark valleys.

You are an inspiration, my friend and you are loved by all of your blogging friends and most importantly by God.

Blessings,
Mary