And I don’t regret the rain,And the nights I felt the pain,And the tears I had to cry some of those times along the way.Every road I had to take,Every time my heart would break -It was just something that I had to get through, To get me to you…”
As sung by Lila McCann,“To Get Me To You” [Hope Floats Soundtrack : Wow, such great words. I have traveled down many roads throughout my life, as I know we all have. Heartbreak has been my closest companion many times on my journey. I have felt the crushing pain fill my chest, and the tears flow like rain drops from my eyes, as I watched my momma die, and when I held her lifeless body in my arms. When I awoke in the hospital after having a total hysterectomy, knowing the dream that I had tried to make come true for 16 years had come to an end. As I sat on the bathroom floor, once again preparing to cut myself, because the pain was too intense to handle anymore. As I read an email from my aunt on June 8th of this year, telling me that my oldest brother had died that morning from diabetes, the same disease I have. Yes, I have felt deep, soul piercing pain, that shook me to the very bone. But, I have also felt sweet, life saving peace, from my all time favorite comforter, my Saviour. If it took all of those heart breaking, fierce storm moments to get me ever closer to Him, then bring on more rain. I will be covered by my Umbrella.
As sung by Lila McCann,“To Get Me To You” [Hope Floats Soundtrack : Wow, such great words. I have traveled down many roads throughout my life, as I know we all have. Heartbreak has been my closest companion many times on my journey. I have felt the crushing pain fill my chest, and the tears flow like rain drops from my eyes, as I watched my momma die, and when I held her lifeless body in my arms. When I awoke in the hospital after having a total hysterectomy, knowing the dream that I had tried to make come true for 16 years had come to an end. As I sat on the bathroom floor, once again preparing to cut myself, because the pain was too intense to handle anymore. As I read an email from my aunt on June 8th of this year, telling me that my oldest brother had died that morning from diabetes, the same disease I have. Yes, I have felt deep, soul piercing pain, that shook me to the very bone. But, I have also felt sweet, life saving peace, from my all time favorite comforter, my Saviour. If it took all of those heart breaking, fierce storm moments to get me ever closer to Him, then bring on more rain. I will be covered by my Umbrella.
10 comments:
Oh sweet Denise! My heart breaks for all that you have been through, for every tear you have cried, every emotional pain that you have felt and every loved one that you have lost. The wonderful thing is that not one tear fell that your Heavenly Father didn't see and He felt each and every one of your pains.
May God continue to richly bless you, dear!
Psalm 56:8-11a
8 You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.
9 On the very day I call to you for help, my enemies will retreat.
This I know: God is on my side.
10 O God, I praise your word.
Yes, LORD, I praise your word.
11 I trust in God, so why should I be afraid?
Have a wonderful evening, dear Denise.
Amen! He is worth it all!
I am not as gifted as you with words. :.} but I know sorrow also in different ways. But now is the time for you to know true happiness and joy. I wish I could take your pain. So I will pray god lays his healing hands on you. And hugs you tight.
That was a lot you went through. But thankfully God is with you through it all. Be reassured! Hugs to you.
You are a woman who knows heartbreak. And why some have more on their plate than others is something I know our heavenly Father will explain IN FULL upon our arrival THERE!
But... until then -- for those who carry heartbreak as their closest companion have a choice -- allow the Creator to carry them through it. Or NOT. Your spirit and kindness and blessed patience shows you've chosen the former! Praise HIM!
. . . Your spirit brings a smile to my face everytime I see your comments on my own blog -- You are an encourager! Ya' have to wonder where that came from... Through affliction? Perhaps. Just your personality? Perhaps. Either way -- It's Jesus shining through!
THANK YOU for Being YOU, sister!
Kindest Thoughts,
~esthermay
Your heart is so transparent. I love you. xxxooogretchen
When we stand in the middle of the fire..... Look close there is another that stands with us! What a Savior ,, what a Savior....... He has stood with you through each and every fire! We will worship HIM because HE is worthy of our worship!
Denise,
So beautifully put. I remember when I was younger, before life became so hard. I always believed life would never be perfect. I just never thought it would be so excruciatingly painful. I'm so thankful we have something to look forward to. A day, my sweet friend, when we will not have all this pain anymore.
Tomorrow, we will celebrate YOUR BIRTHDAY! Happy happy birthday! You are so loved in this bloggy world, as I have no doubt by all who know you. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! for being my friend and loving me! You are one very special person.
Just as the "ANGEL" is described at the header on your blog today.
Love you, sweet friend!
Cheryl
A depth of insight into others comes from sharing our stories of loss, pain, disappointment, but all in light of redemption. God's grace and mercy are good. I'm grateful to have read your story and know you a bit more each time I visit you. Thanks for participating IOW this week. I'm so blessed.
Blessings to you.
I see through all the words into what God has done for you and what HE IS DOING THROUGH your life! What a blessing you are to so many!
Love you dearly sister!!
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